Mccordmatt’s Weblog

Sex, Love, and Lasting Relationships: The way God wants sex to be

God desires us to enjoy sex, like I said last week for 3 reasons: a. Children, b. our enjoyment, c. for His Glory. God created sex to be great, awesome, wonderful, fulfilling, etc.  But He created it for one setting and one setting only, One man, one woman, one marriage for life.

Two words that describe how God wants your sex life to be: (I thess. 4:4)

1.  Sanctified — Process of becoming more like Christ.  How can sex be becoming more like Christ, well enjoying His creation in the manner and only in the manner in which He created it, one man, one woman in marriage for life.

2.  Honorable — God wants to see us enjoy sex the way He created it, but He also wants our sex life to honor Him.

How does the Bible describe an ungodly sex life? ( I Thess. 4:5)

“Like the heathen, who do not know God”

6 forms of sexual immorality according to Leviticus 20; keeping in mind this is the Old Testament, does this chapter remind you of any generation today?

1. Fornication — Sex outside of Marriage

2. Adulturey – Sex with a married person

3. Incest — Sex with a family member

4. Homosexuality — Sex with someone of the same sex

5. Bestiality — Sex with animals

6. Pedophilia — Sex or sex act with children

How is it possible to avoid sexual immorality/sin? (I Cor. 6:18)

Flee, run, sprint, get away fast etc.

Bad reasons for romantic relationships:

1. It makes me Feel Good about myself.

2. It makes me Look Good to other people.

3. It helps me to satisfy the desires of my flesh.

4. Defrauding — Stirring up desires in others that they cannot righteously satisfy.

How do we defraud:

1. Inappropriate Dress (Immodesty)

2. Inappropriate Flirting

3. Inappropriate words (”I Love You”)

4. Inappropriate touch

The goal of our deepest and most intimate relationships should be to bring the other person closer to Christ.  Not to Christ (Missionary dating) I Cor. 6:14-15

Sex, Love, and Lasting Relationships: Difference Between Boys and Girls

So what are some of the big difference between Guys and Girls?

Well lets see:

Guys are:                                         Girls are:

Visual                                                 Emotional

Pushy                                                 Guarded

Constant                                             Moody

What is the goal for Romance: To have Intimacy in Marriage.

If we want intimacy in marriage then lets start with what intimacy is: Intimacy is No Fear of Rejection (Gen. 2:25)

Keys:

1.  Sex is important to you, and to God.  ( I Cor. 7:1-8)

God created sex for three main reasons, a. children, b. our enjoyment, c. His Glory.  But God created sex, sex is not a bad thing it is a wonderful, awesome thing when used in its right place and manner, after marriage. We can not truly enjoy the gift of sex in any way outside of the boundaries of marriage.

2.  You are responsible for YOUR OWN sexual behavior (I Thess. 4:1-4) What type of situations do we put ourselves in?  Many times we put ourselves in places where we have very little chance not to fail.  Dating for instances, we should not date alone,  go in groups so there is not temptation to mess up and fall into sin.

3.  You are Partially responsible for the behavior of other Christians. (I Thess. 4:5-6).  How can I be responsible for someone else, well when you read these verses it will help you understand that if you are defrauding someone you are causing them to sin. Defrauding is causing desires to stir up in others that they can not righteously satisfy.  Girls you wear something cut way low, or very tight you are defrauding the guys, how you ask, go back to the top and re-read what guys are. . . . . we are visual.  Guys, telling your girlfriend you “love them” is defrauding them why you ask, go back to the list. . . . . girls are emotional, when you connect with them by throwing out those words you can cause them to stumble and defraud them. 

4.  Your deepest, most intimate relationship must be based on Common Values (II Cor. 6:14-15).  These verses are the verse that say “do not be unequally yoked with someone who is not a believer.”  well it is because you have nothing in common that matters.  You might like the same ice cream or the same color but the one thing that matters the most is not there, your relationship with Christ.

Remember Sex is not bad, it is very good when practiced in the manner God created it to be, within the marriage of one man to one woman for life.

How as Christian’s can we raise the bar in our relationship with our Lord, Jesus Christ?  We have began a new study on Raising the Bar(Title Borrowed from Highview Baptist Church, Louisville, Ky) in our spiritual lives. 

There are four ways we are looking at raising the bar; Worship, Reading Scripture, Praying, and giving.  Each week we are going to be looking at how we can raise the bar in each of the area’s

The first being raising the bar in worship, first lets define worship; worship is raising something or someone higher than yourself.  This could be any different things, cars, money, jobs, sports, etc.  But for this blog and these messages we are saying worship is a lifestyle,  a lifestyle of living what you say you are in the walls of the church and taking that outside to where you live, work, and play.   We have to realize that in our worship of God, It’s not about me it’s about the God who created me. 

Hebrews 10:19-25

We find that we can raise the bar by having the confidence to go into the Holy of Hollies (V. 19).  What is the Holy of Hollies?  It is the most Holy place in the temple.  The dwelling place of God’s spirit.  The high priest could only go into the Holy of Hollies once a year and only after he made sure he was right with God first, because if he went into that Holiest place being unclean God would kill him on the spot. 

Vs. 20-21 tells us that we know longer have to go to the Holy of Hollies because in Matthew 27:50-51 “And when Jesus had cried out again in a loud voice, he gave up His spirit.  At that moment the curtain of the temple was torn in two from top to bottom. The earth shook and the rocks split.”  When Jesus took the sin of the world on Himself we no longer had to go the temple but as Christian we are always in the temple.  We have a direct communication to God at all times.  We no longer need someone else to come and be the only contact to God for us, We can approach the Throne Room of God.

 I believe verse 22 gives us one of the best definitions of worship or what worship is.  It does so by making two phrases that gives me that idea.  First, is the phrase”sincere heart,”  when we come to God with a sincere heart wanting Him to work in our lives and forgive us of our sins His is faithful to do so.  But, if we come with a heart of motive, a heart that is looking for something in return then that would not be worship, that would be selfish and prideful.  Secondly, is “cleanse us from a guilty conscience.”  This is worship because to be able to have true worship we need to have a clean conscience.  Without trouble on our heart and mind.  It goes back to the statement you will hear me say a lot, “It’s not about us, it’s about the God who created us.”

 Verses 23-24, worship is “unswervingly to the hope we profess” we stay true to God we are not going off target or to the left or right we are staying focused on Him.  Worship in these verse is also the opportunity “to spur one another on.”  We need each other to fall on as we struggle and fall.  We need people to be there to kick us in the back side and tell us that we are falling away and need to refocus and not swerve away from what God is calling us to do. 

Now, how are we suppose to be spurred on if we are coming and being with His body?

Verse 25 covers that, “Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another — and all the more as you see the day approaching.” Or as T. W. Hunts puts it in From Heavens Veiw, as we see that Graduation day approaching. 

 We worship an awesome God, the one and only God!  I encourage anyone who has the chance to read this to raise the bar in worship, reading God’s Word, praying, and giving to His church for His purpose.

John 4:23 says, “Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshipers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks.